I am someone who loves to ponder and indulge in the intricacies of the human condition, especially as they relate to love. I intend to gratify myself here. If you are easily shocked, have an aversion to curse words, alternative love-styles or are only interested in happy endings you may want to skip over this blog. Also, I have simple-minded grasp of linguistics and often can’t spell.
I came to blog about my addiction to love and how I am overcoming that problem. I have written a story about what happened and would like to post it here. I am tempted to start another blog just to rant about what is going on with me now and issues I feel unable to comprehend. Most of the time I am depressed except when I am pissed off and I think that’s because getting mad feels a little better than feeling depressed. I hope it’s not all doom and gloom, but it could be. I think it will mostly be cynical, but that’s the best I can do right now.
Also,
I have decided to publish this blog in order to honor all women or men who have ever been or felt they were hopelessly in love with someone else. I publish it also to honor all of my dear friends who have been gently nudging me to get my writing out to the world.
Questions?
What is love?
Is love blind or guilelessly indiscriminant?
Why do we continue to engage in relationships that frankly, suck?
When those relationships end why, in the name of God would we want that other person back?
This is my story. The un-love story!
My experience in love has been:
Apparently my email address hasn’t been working so if you want to speak to me privately please send mail to: loveobsessed69 @ yahoo dot com!
Update ~ June 29, 2008:
I created this page on October 13, 2007 and I’m not feeling the same anymore. I hate to be cliche, but time can heal all wounds, well most of them anyway and first I would like to say that I don’t think love stinks. I think love can smell funny sometimes. I also believe that actual love is not what its purported to be in the movies or in romance novels and one of the reasons that relationships fail is because we have the mistaken belief that it does. True love, actual love is very, very different and it requires a measure of commitment to the relationship that to me seems rare in a world where instant gratification is more important than long term gratification. Relationships need to be nurtured and we cannot expect them to last if we turn away from our partner when there is trouble or when it gets boring. Cuz it’s going to get boring and then it’s going to bet better again and arguments will happen and illness may happen and money issues will happen, but if you stick together instead of falling apart you will be able to have a long standing love affair, it just won’t be like it seems in the movies, where we never see the ever after! I will be the first to say get out of a relationship if you don’t have a real partner, you know, the kind who supports you, uplifts you, makes you laugh, someone you can cry with and who doesn’t judge, criticize or slap you around. They can help you see yourself clearly and they see you clearly and love you for that reason and maybe in spite of it! I also believe you should have a lot in common, especially in the bedroom because you want to be able to play together and be open to express that love physically. I am still Seriously Single and I’ve chosen to be single for a reason and this is something I’ve learned in the past couple of years. If I don’t love myself I will never be able to choose a partner who loves me. Because when I don’t love myself I might just settle for the next loser who comes along because I am afraid of being alone forever and fear should never be dating motivation. I’ve decided that I want a relationship that will last and in order for that to happen I have to know what I want and also be able to choose who can make that happen with me. I am absolutely tired of cycling through relationships with the wrong people and wasting my precious time on men who have no fucking idea what I’m talking about even though they think they do. I didn’t finish the story I set out to write on here because I’m not in the mood to revisit that pain and humiliation. I don’t want to honor or dishonor in words something that I once held precious, but simply didn’t work out because I chose the wrong man again. He wasn’t right for me and I doubt he will ever be right for someone else but maybe he will and that’s okay with me because I am no longer stuck in an unsatisfying situation which frees me up to find a better more satisfying one and so with hindsight being what it is I feel lucky to have escaped mostly unscathed. I’m just not interested in writing about it now. When I’m ready to date I will and I will update here or maybe even start another blog or rename this one, but in the meantime I’m just going to write and post and if it’s about relationships it will be what’s on my mind and I may be pissed off or I may just be in awe of the other relationships I have that are not romantic, but where true love is demonstrated to me in a real way not what I imagined to be true about romance, because we can find love whenever we look for it, it is all around! And It doesn’t have to come from a man!
I will take the challenge to read this blog. I’m not easily shocked
Keep it up.
Thank you. I am very new to blogging and unsure about many things such as trackbacks, I tried to trackback to your blog, but may have messed it up. I am reading faqs, but oten still confused. Thanks for reading!
Hello! I came across your blog and love it! I’m new to blogging too. Write more great posts - you write well.
I’ll add you on my blog roll.
Yeap, love stinks but I’ll have it anytime. Great stuff you have here. H
hi there -
thanks for the add to your blogroll! you’ve got a good thing going here - if there’s one thing I can get behind, it’s bitterness and struggle (and difficulty spelling).
What a great blog! I am also a victim of infidelity and that’s why I created WomanSavers.com, the “World’s Largest Database Rating Men” targeting abusive and cheating men. It’s women networking together to share there stories to bring the good guys to the top and the bad to the bottom. My goal is to change the way the next generation of women deal with men by making better, safer and more informed decisions.
Don’t give up hope. There are good guys out there. You just have to make sure you screen them heavily and research their past relationships. …Sometimes you have to kiss a lot of frogs, before you find a prince.
Best,
“Little Miss WomanSaver,” Founder
WomanSavers.com
Thanks for commenting and for the compliment on my site! I haven’t given up hope, but I have kissed a lot of frogs so far, lol. I appreciate your effort to help women everywhere! I’ll check out your site!
Keep the good one up!
Ra.
PS. Thanks for adding me in your BlogRoll.
Will do! And your welcome!
Loving your blog! And thank you for looking at mine. I love how your words about love run from the obvious (”Love Stinks”
to the sublime (Yin and Yang blog). Finding a likeminded soul is a wonderful thing…thank you for sharing and I look forward to reading more. 
Thank you so much. I’m happy you noticed the Yin and Yang of it all, thinking of changing the name of the blog to that. It is nice and rare to find someone who knows what you’re talking about!
You have a great blog! Thought provoking. Life is full of surprises. Many questions in our life were asked, am still being asked, and will still be asked again. At different stages of life, the way we approached life questions is different and hence our answers would be different as well. That’s why we have to keep on reflecting upon our life, esp. the life that we have not lived yet.
All the best!
Thanks for the compliment on my blog. What you said is indeed true! Through out my life I have asked the same questions over and over and in different ways, but I am not so sure my answers were any different, but I do keep reflecting and at this stage I think some of the answers are changing. So I suppose that is a good thing. I don’t think I can reflect on experiences I haven’t had yet, so I think what you are saying when you mention reflecting on a life I have not lived are the experiences I want to have, but haven’t yet. To that I say I am still seeking so that I can reflect. Thanks for you comment!
Your words are so true. I’ve been in some pretty bad relationships but I’ve finally found someone who is perfect for me. We have had some rough times and supported each other through it all, so you are right relationships do need nurturing and as long as you are truly committed to each other you will make it. I will definitely continue to read and enjoy your blog!
Thank you for commenting. I am always happy to learn that someone has found a relationship that is true and real and that they have discovered what real love is! I’m happy for you that you have found it and I will take a click over to your blog as well!
Hey there! I feel like I’m late to the party by reading that update from a week ago. I’m happy that your opinions have grown and evolved.
Personally, at the moment I seem to be in the ‘I give up and I’m not looking stage”, hoping maybe fate will be kind and someone will come in my life while my back is turned…
Love and relationships are the easiest and the hardest things in the world and I have found that when I go looking, I end up in the wrong places and get bitch slapped for it…heehee. Maybe while I’m not looking, I’ll stumble into the real thing. Who knows…
Hi Glassowater! Thanks for noticing that I changed this page. I didn’t mention it so no one would really notice unless they were looking. I wish you didn’t sound so “hopeless”, maybe you and I are being cautiously optimistic!
Seems to me you are a great guy whose been dating the wrong girls. I always date the wrong guys too! Maybe we like getting bitch slapped. I don’t know what it is, but at this point I am not ready to date. I’m taking care of myself and doing what I want to do on my own, so when I am ready I won’t be desperate and I will be paying attention. Right now I’m just having fun. I hope you are too! You’re really a wonderful person and an exceptional man! I know you will find someone who loves you! Hope that wasn’t too corny!
hey there - tried to email you in response to this but the address that shows up on my site was incorrect….
it was a yahoo address but it did not work…and I was sad…
I’m not sure why that address doesn’t work, I do receive mail there. Try pheadra77@yahoo.com, or if you leave your email add I will email you. Will be out this morning, but back until 2:30 then later again tonight!