Here’s a little filler for you and some info on “green” living, from Gimundo. I hate all the new age lingo, but it doesn’t make doing the thing any less important! I have cut and pasted the entire article to save you a click, but within it is a guide on how to recycle what and that does require a click if you’re interested!

“Cities like San Francisco may have placed a ban on plastic bags in grocery stores and boast of bike-friendly roads, but if you really want to discover the world’s greenest spot, you’ll have to head overseas, to the small town of Kamikatsu, Japan.

In Kamikatsu, there’s no such thing as trash. You won’t find a single garbage bin in any of the town’s homes, and there’s not a dump anywhere within driving distance. Instead, the resourceful residents must compost all waste from their food, and sort other trash into 34 separate categories, with sections for plastic bottles, razor blades, Styrofoam, and various other paraphernalia.

The crazy part? Most locals actually seem to like the extreme recycling process. Kikue Nii, one resident, claims that the town’s no-waste policy makes her more mindful of what she’s using, and helps her to take advantage of every last scrap. “I think I produce less waste because I have to compost it,” she told BBC News

“When I can’t use the whole vegetable or meat, I try to cook it again with wine and so on. It makes a very good soup. Everyone should have a composter if they can.”

While most of us may not be as ecologically-enlightened as the residents of Kamikatsu, the idea that people on the other side of the world are separating their scraps into 34 categories may at least help you get motivated to recycle your cans and bottles, as a minimum. And if you feel like taking their example, check out Lime’s Guide to Recycling to learn how to responsibly ditch all your trash without heading towards the dump.”

This must be animal week or Earth week of something. I am dealing with some personal stuff right now, which I will surely blog about on the weekend when I have 2 minutes to myself, but in the mean time someone sent me this video and I cry every single time I watch it. Animals are so amazing, when they love you they love you! The sentimental readers will probably cry their lovin eyes out when they watch this. Every time I see I can’t help myself, I blubber. It’s an expression of true love! I have tried to download it several times and have had no luck, so I am pasting the link here.

Christian the Lion ~ The Full Story in HQ

If it doesn’t work you can of course find it on You Tube, the barer of all things video!

I have a really busy, busy week a head and if I post at all it will be some fun informational stuff or funny pictures if I can find them. Sorry about the lack of Dude related posts lately, but my focus is elsewhere!

Some Animal Trivia

• A RABBIT loves licorice - but it is very bad for them because they cannot digest sugars.DALMATIONS are the only breed of dog that gets gout (because they are the only mammals, other than humans, which produce uric acid).

  SLUGS have four noses - well actually a pair of gills for breathing and a pair of rhinopores (chemosensory organs) used for smelling.

  HONEYBEES have hairs on their eyes to help them collect pollen.

  The left leg of a CHICKEN is tendered than the right one, which it uses most, therefore increasing muscle development.

  The sperm of a MOUSE is longer than the sperm of an elephant.

  MICE are highly promiscuous and need particularly large testes to keep up with demand.

  More human deaths have been attributed to FLEAS than all the wars ever fought.

  As carriers of the bubonic plague, fleas were responsible for killing one third of the population of Europe in the 14th century.

  A CAT uses its whiskers to determine if a space is too small to squeeze through.

  GOLDFISH lose their color if kept in dim light. Much like humans getting a tan, they need sunlight to keep their pigment.

  ALBATROSSES have a wing span of up to 14ft and need to land only once every couple of years to breed. They can travel hundreds of thousands of miles each flight.

  Certain Chinese and American ALLIGATORS can survive the winter by freezing their heads in ice, leaving their nose out to breath for months on end.

  DOLPHINS sleep with one half of the brain at a time, and one eye closed.

  When two DOGS approach each other, the dog which wags its tail very slowly - showing anger - is in charge.

  Some LIONS can mate more than 50 times a day.

  If you lift a KANGAROO’S tail off the ground it can’t hop - they use their tails for balance.

  For every person there are roughly 200 million INSECTS.

  A CROCODILE cannot stick its tongue out, because it is attached to the bottom of its mouth. This is why they appear to gulp their food down.

  ELEPHANTS are the only mammals that can’t jump.

  CAMELS have three eyelids to protect themselves from blowing sand.

  Many HAMSTERS blink only one eye at a time.

  A FLAMINGO can eat only when its head is upside down. Its tongue pumps water through the sieve-like ridges that line its beak in order to trap microscopic algae.

  A DOLPHIN’S hearing is so acute that it can pick up an underwater sound from 15 miles away.

  BUTTERFLIES taste with their hind feet.

  A SNAIL can sleep for three years if conditions are adverse (such as during a drought).

  BEES have five eyes - three small ones on top of their head and two larger ones in front.

  POLAR BEARS are the only mammal with hair on the soles of their feet. It helps them to get a good grip on icy surfaces, and also acts as a heat insulator.

  Most ELEPHANTS weigh less than the tongue of a blue whale.

  The only two animals that can see behind themselves without turning their head are the RABBIT and the PARROT.

  PENGUINS can jump as high as 6ft in the air.

  The last animal in the dictionary is the ZYZZYVA, a tropical weevil.

  ELEPHANTS have been found swimming miles from shore in the Indian Ocean.

  The leg bones of a BAT are so thin that they cannot walk.

  GREAT WHITE SHARKS can go as long as three months without eating.

  GOAT’S eyes have rectangular pupils, which enable them to watch over their broad, flat grazing area for predators.

  KIWI BIRDS are blind and hunt by smell.

  GIRAFFES have no vocal cords and communicate by vibrating the air around their necks.

  A female OYSTER may produce 100 million young over her lifetime.

  MOSQUITOES are attracted to the color blue twice as much as to any other color.

  No two ZEBRAS have the same markings.

  The longest recorded flight of a CHICKEN is 13 seconds.

  A BEE must visit 4,000 flowers to make one tablespoon of honey.

  By swallowing water, the PUFFER FISH becomes too big for other fish to swallow.

  A full-grown BEAR can run as fast as a horse.

  Female FLEAS drink 15 times their weight in blood every day.

  When a GIRAFFE’S baby is born, it falls from a height of 6ft, usually without being hurt.

  A DRAGONFLY can spot an insect moving 33ft away.

  CAMEL milk does not curdle, because it has adapted to the desert heat.

  POLAR BEARS can swim 60 miles without pausing for a rest.

There is honour in being a dog.
- Aristotle

I’ve learned a lot by simply observing my dog. I have a Shiba Inu. I was never a “dog person”, I always had cat’s because dogs seemed to take up too much space, eat too much food and require too much attention. Whereas cats simply did their own thing. When I got married, I think in place of having children we had dogs. In the divorce I was granted ownership of one of them, and I’ll tell you what I am so glad I was! As time passes I find that when I pay attention I can learn a lot from this loving, intuitive, loyal creature. This is what I have learned so far in no particular order.

• It’s Okay to lick someone’s face if you really, really like them!
• Whenever you go somewhere check the perimeter to find out what is going on and be aware of any danger that might be lurking.
• When a stranger comes to your door bark like crazy.
• When meeting strangers, if your gut tells you they are creepy stand back 50 feet and growl until they go away, if they don’t leave bear your teeth and bark so loud you split their ear drums.
• Chasing your tail offers no long term solutions, but gets a lot of laughs from everyone around you.
• Make your bed nice and comfy before getting in, take time when doing this, fluff everything up and don’t lay down until you’ve found the perfect spot.
• Always bury some bones for another day because you never know when you are going to need them.
• Protect the ones you love at any cost even if it means you have to get into a scrap with someone else.
• Lay down next to the ones you love and where ever you go stay by their side or at least always know where they are in any room.
• Love can be expressed without a word, it comes through your eyes, the tilt of your head or a gentle nudge.
• Always mark your territory so you know where you’ve been.
• If something bothers you, stop and pay attention.
• Always take a whiff of someone before you get too close to them. If they smell bad steer clear.
• If you really have to poop don’t hold it in.
• Go outside and play every single day.
• Be fascinated with nature and every little creature in it, if it’s edible chase it and then eat it, food is a good thing.
• If you stuff yourself you are going to feel bloated and you will have to sleep it off for several hours.
• If you’re tired go to sleep.
• When someone you love comes over jump up and give them lots of attention.
• When you get in a fight with someone, resolve the issue and move on to the next best thing, playing. Never hold a grudge unless that someone really hurt you then always be on guard when they come around and never trust them again.

When I observe animals what I see is that everything is so simple for them. Probably because they don’t have egos and their brains are the size of walnuts, or pellets. Not too sure about that anatomy, but mostly I think it’s because they rely more on instinct than on thought. If it feels right they do it and if it doesn’t they just don’t. The never “intentionally” hurt others and when they do fight it is simply to protect what’s theirs or to scare off something that threatens their home or food. They are also intuitive about love. They care for and protect the ones they love and never, ever judge them for their appearance or actions unless they are abusive and then they move away quietly. My dog can sense when I’m upset and she stays by my side until she senses that I am well again and she misses me when I am gone and is always happy to see me when I return. They say the dog is man’s best friend, but I think she is a woman’s best friend too, now if I can only find a man with these qualities I will be set for life!

I received these pictures in my email, twice! Every time I looked at them I thought the Panda has got to be the cutest animal alive, they also seem so loving! I’m really glad that they are being taken care of!

Wouldn’t you help a Panda? I’m so glad my image uploader is working today! This is a cause I would donate to! I would even adopt one, except they grow-up and eat all the sugar in the house and I don’t have any! Hug a Panda today!

I have always been fascinated by incidents that cannot be explained and weird things that go bump in the night. When I was a kid I used to watch the show with Rod Serling, or is it Rod Sterling? My mind has gone to mush so I can’t remember much about what I learn or watched including the name of the series, but I have found a list of strange coincidences and I thought I might post it here for anyone who is interested in strange happenings that are documented to be true. Enjoy!

10. Childhood Book

While American novelist Anne Parrish was browsing bookstores in Paris in the 1920s, she came upon a book that was one of her childhood favorites - Jack Frost and Other Stories. She picked up the old book and showed it to her husband, telling him of the book she fondly remembered as a child. Her husband took the book, opened it, and on the flyleaf found the inscription: “Anne Parrish, 209 N. Weber Street, Colorado Springs.” It was Anne’s very own book.

9. Poker Luck

In 1858, Robert Fallon was shot dead, an act of vengeance by those with whom he was playing poker. Fallon, they claimed, had won the $600 pot through cheating. With Fallon’s seat empty and none of the other players willing to take the now unlucky $600, they found a new player to take Fallon’s place and staked him with the dead man’s $600. By the time the police had arrived to investigate the killing, the new player had turned the $600 into $2,200 in winnings. The police demanded the original $600 to pass on to Fallon’s next of kin - only to discover that the new player turned out to be Fallon’s son, who had not seen his father in seven years!

8. Poe Coincidence

In the 19th century, the famous horror writer, Egdar Allan Poe, wrote a book called “The narrative of Arthur Gordon Pym”. It was about four survivors of a shipwreck who were in an open boat for many days before they decided to kill and eat the cabin boy whose name was Richard Parker. Some years later in 1884 the yawl Mignonette foundered, with only four survivors, who were in an open boat for many days. Eventually the three senior members of the crew killed and ate the cabin boy. The name of the cabin boy was Richard Parker.

7. Photographic Coincidence

A German mother who photographed her infant son in 1914 left the film to be developed at a store in Strasbourg. In those days some film plates were sold individually. World War I broke out and unable to return to Strasbourg, the woman gave up the picture for lost. Two years later she bought a film plate in Frankfurt, over 100 miles away, to take a picture of her newborn daughter. When developed the film turned out to be a double exposure, with the picture of her daughter superimposed on the earlier picture of her son. Through some incredible twist of fate, her original film, never developed, had been mislabeled as unused, and had eventually been resold to her.

6. Book Find

In 1973, actor Anthony Hopkins agreed to appear in “The Girl From Petrovka”, based on a novel by George Feifer. Unable to find a copy of the book anywhere in London, Hopkins was surprised to discover one lying on a bench in a train station. It turned out to be George Feifer’s own annotated (personal) copy, which Feifer had lent to a friend, and which had been stolen from his friend’s car.

5. Revenge Killing

In 1883, Henry Ziegland broke off a relationship with his girlfriend who, out of distress, committed suicide. The girl’s enraged brother hunted down Ziegland and shot him. Believing he had killed Ziegland, the brother then took his own life. In fact, however, Ziegland had not been killed. The bullet had only grazed his face, lodging into a tree. It was a narrow escape. Years later, Ziegland decided to cut down the same tree, which still had the bullet in it. The huge tree seemed so formidable that he decided to blow it up with dynamite. The explosion propelled the bullet into Ziegland’s head, killing him.

4. Golden Scarab

From,“The Structure and Dynamics of the Psyche” A young woman I was treating had, at a critical moment, a dream in which she was given a golden scarab. While she was telling me this dream I sat with my back to the closed window. Suddenly I heard a noise behind me, like a gentle tapping. I turned round and saw a flying insect knocking against the windowpane from outside. I opened the window and caught the creature in the air as it flew in. It was the nearest analogy to the golden scarab that one finds in our latitudes, a scarabaeid beetle, the common rose-chafer (Cetonia aurata) which contrary to its usual habits had evidently felt an urge to get into a dark room at this particular moment. I must admit that nothing like it ever happened to me before or since, and that the dream of the patient has remained unique in my experience.” - Carl Jung

3. Taxi

In 1975, while riding a moped in Bermuda, a man was accidentally struck and killed by a taxi. One year later, this man’s brother was killed in the very same way. In fact, he was riding the very same moped. And to stretch the odds even further, the very same taxi driven by the same driver - and even carrying the very same passenger struck him!

2. Hotel Discovery

In 1953, television reporter Irv Kupcinet was in London to cover the coronation of Ellizabeth II. In one of the drawers in his room at the Savoy he found some items that, by their identification, belonged to a man named Harry Hannin. Coincidentally, Harry Hannin - a basketball star with the famed Harlem Globetrotters - was a good friend of Kupcinet’s. But the story has yet another twist. Just two days later, and before he could tell Hannin of his lucky discovery, Kupcinet received a letter from Hannin. In the letter, Hannin told Kucinet that while staying at the Hotel Meurice in Paris, he found in a drawer a tie - with Kupcinet’s name on it.

1. Historical Coincidence

The lives of Thomas Jefferson and John Adams, two of America’s founders. Jefferson crafted the Declaration of Independence, showing drafts of it to Adams, who (with Benjamin Franklin) helped to edit and hone it. The Continental Congress approved the document on July 4, 1776. Surprisingly, both Jefferson and Adams died on the same day, July 4, 1826 - exactly 50 years from the signing of the Declaration of Independence.

Do you suffer from Opinion Dislodgement Disorder, (ODD) too?

I think I suffer from it because once I have an opinion stuck in my skull it’s pretty difficult for me to dislodge it. Some examples might include, but are not limited to, men only love bitches, all men are the same and the worst things happen to good people or occasionally I might think there is no justice in the world. So I could go around being pretty pissed off most of the time and this occurs frequently when I am driving. What is it about driving behind an idiot that upsets me so much? You’d think I’d be used to it by now! So Yesterday on my over to cafe heaven, a name I made up, which I’m thinking now would be a damn fine moniker for a caffeine establishment, which in actuality is named Starbucks, I was driving behind an asshole. Now normally I would never venture out for coffee at the wee hours of the morning because I have a fabulous coffee maker at home, but I had to get me some blood tests and I could not eat or drink anything except water for 12 hours. Not such a difficult task, except I had to forego the coffee, and this can be devastating for my state of mind and can be hazardous to the health and well being of those who come into contact with me. The distance between my home and said liquid energy juice can be measured in blocks, but for ease of use let’s just say it’s less than a mile and within that space of road I encountered more than one bad driver who I cursed, they don’t use their signals because they have a phone attached to their face, stop in front of me for no discernable reason and most annoying are the ones who go too fucking slow. I got stuck behind one going too fucking slow, and I mean slow, since the posted speed limit was 35 mph. So I’m pissed and muddling along behind at a crawl when I decide to actually look at the car in front of me since it’s causing me so much anxiety. I notice at first glance that it’s an older vehicle, white and the left side is off kilter to the point that it is almost touching the ground, the windows are filthy and I can barely see anyone’s head above the drivers side or passenger seats and I’m thinking maybe they are really old. Upon closer inspection I see that on the roof of the car right above the driver’s head is a red plastic cup, which I can only assume is filled with liquid? What the Fuck? Did the ass hat set it on of top the car get in and then forget to take about it? Is he/she doing an experiment to see how far they can drive before it falls off? And is this the reason for the unholy slowness? Or is it that most drivers are idiots? See experiences like these prevent me dislodging my opinions about drivers in general and when shit happens all the time it’s hard to make me believe otherwise. I wonder if anyone else noticed that cup?

]]> http://dontdatethatdude.wordpress.com/2008/07/08/opinion-dislodgement-disorder-or-odd/feed/ LoveObsessed http://dontdatethatdude.wordpress.com/2008/07/06/serenity-sunday-30/ http://dontdatethatdude.wordpress.com/2008/07/06/serenity-sunday-30/#comments Sun, 06 Jul 2008 14:38:09 +0000 dontdatethatdude http://dontdatethatdude.wordpress.com/?p=997

Codependence versus Independence and Finding Real Freedom!

This might be the perfect time to write about independence or freedom and how codependency can effect the way we love ourselves and others simply because the 4th has just passed or simply because I’m in the mood. I feel like finding our way in relationships can be confusing especially when it concerns finding our own freedom within the confines of a partnership. This is hard enough when both people are relatively healthy minded. When you add in restrictive childhoods or abuse in childhood it can take years before you find your way into healthy, lasting love.

Below are common definitions of codependency:

MHA Definition of codependence

codependency is “an emotional and behavioral condition that affects an individual’s ability to have a healthy, mutually satisfying relationship. It is also known as ‘relationship addiction’ because people with codependency often form or maintain relationships that are one-sided, emotionally destructive and/or abusive.”

Robert Subby defines codependency as “An emotional, psychological, and behavioral condition that develops as a result of an individual’s prolonged exposure to, and practice of, a set of oppressive rules.”

The term comes out of treating alcoholics and their loved ones, who developed codependent patterns to cope with the alcoholic’s behavior. Codependency is a pattern of response. It’s a habitual way of reacting that is learned as a coping mechanism to an unhealthy situation.

Researchers found that the codependency habits become so ingrained in people that they persist beyond the interaction with the addict. That is, these patterns can exist and be passed down in families over time, even when the addiction is no longer present.

My personal experience has been one of losing myself in any long-term romantic relationship I’m involved in. Losing yourself for the benefit of a relationship is a life sucking experience. But what is more important is that when you are losing yourself in someone else it’s really just a distraction that keeps you from recognizing your own desires, hopes, goals, feelings and needs. Why this happens most certainly takes root in childhood and creates a pattern of self-deprecating behaviors that seem so normal it’s impossible to actually notice what you are doing, much less change it. That is until your life becomes un-liveable. It didn’t say unmanageable, because I could manage anything, I could fix anything and I could make anything work as long as it kept me in the relationship. It wasn’t until I noticed I could not live like that anymore that I realized there was something about me that wasn’t right. I noticed that other people didn’t have the same problems with intimacy and that other people also had boundaries that I lacked. Other people could say no. I could not and if I wanted to say no, rather than say it I would lie or make an excuse so that I would not have to show up. Now I just don’t lie anymore. I tell the truth and I’ll be damned it works. People respect the truth. You can’t argue with the truth. The truth is the truth. And that’s all I have to say about that!

Being in a co-dependent relationship is the polar opposite of the definition of freedom:

I procured this definition of freedom at Dictionary.com whose ease of availability keeps most of my posts free of spelling errors:

1. Exemption from external control, interference, regulation
2. Personal liberty, as opposed to bondage or slavery
3. Exemption from the presence of anything specified (usually fol. by from): freedom from fear.
4. The absence of or release from ties, obligations, etc.
5. Frankness of manner or speech.
6. The power to exercise choice and make decisions without constraint from within or without; autonomy; self-determination.

Co-dependency, while being self-imposed is unconscious and while we feel we are making free choices we definitely are not. It takes a lot of heartache to disembowel your primary thought process and actually realize that it is not the end all, be all of existence. I felt that every decision I made was controlled or interfered with by the presence of my partner simply because I had to consider his needs before I considered mine. I was in fear, not because of any actual danger, but because if I said what I thought or did what I wanted to do he would leave me. This prevented me from exercising personal liberty. I was bound by marriage or verbal commitment and held that obligation with fear of being alone or with guilt that I had not tried hard enough. I lost my personal autonomy altogether because I wanted to be loved, and in all of this I felt I had no choice. And all of these feeling, I believed very deeply were love, I trademarked marked them love as if love were something that must be earned instead of given, as if love could not be granted me unless I acted, thought, or did certain things and it was unbearable. My last relationship unhinged me to the point of self destruction, but if it were not for pain I would not be able to write these words now, because I would still be back there living a delusion, so I am more than grateful for the experience.

I always hope that others do not have to experience what I did in order to find independence, but I have noticed that sometimes we have to lose ourselves in order to find ourselves again and if that’s the price that leads to freedom of illusion then so be it!

This 4th of July I would like to pay homage to “Crazy Frankenstein”, the Idiot who lived on our block when I was growing up. You know this guy! He’s the one who among other stunts, makes tennis-ball-can-rocket-launchers and shoots them at animals and sometimes, accidentally-on-purpose injures a five year-old across the street. He puts fire crackers up frogs asses and when he’s not outside embodying the term idiot, he’s in his basement working on experiments that will never influence the world in any significant way except to perplex and ask why. In actuality he’s a genius, but ends up becoming a dirty drunk, living in a trailer on Old Kings Highway in a small butt-crack town anywhere in America. You’re surprised that he was once married and fathered off-spring, because you cannot imagine anyone ever getting naked in the same bed with him. He’s an honest to goodness mouth breather unconscious of the fact that his jaw is a gap at all times which you would think would cause it to dry up inside, but instead he rhythmically swallows the saliva pooling in the trough of his jaw by sucking back loudly through his teeth at the moment just before it begins to spill over his cracked lips, but in that awful moment when he forgets a line of drool will run out, which he wipes away with the back of his oil stained hand, annoyed that he has to think about it at all. His front teeth buck out straight and his wide bottom lip folds out way to far, revealing his gums and that little piece of flesh that connects your bottom lip to your bottom teeth. I think this malformation was the reason he spit when he talked and may have had something to do with his timed sucking in behavior either way everyone took care to stand out of range when he spoke. But he never said very much. His tiny eyes are magnified behind coke bottle bottom glasses, and this created the illusion that he had the longest color-free eyelashes on the planet. He never seemed to wash and his straight greasy hair might might have been blonde. Most of the time he smelled like Fritos. And all things being equal in my world of aquaintances, If a vote was ever taken he would be voted least likely to get ever get laid and most likely to fornicate with farm animals! He was to my mind the most unfuckable creature alive! And still he sired some children, a true testament to the bizarre nature of procreation and one hell of a shock for me!

One year, before the fire, he had a motorcycle accident, if you could call what he was driving a motorcycle, it had 2 wheels a seat, an incredibly loud motor that sounded like an off-timed lawn mower and a steering device, but I think he took odd parts he had laying around his garage and assembled it in one afternoon after having consumed copious amounts of Genie Cream Ale. After he finished each can he would burp loudly and crush that dead soldier in his fist or sometimes smash it against his skull in a manly-man sort of way and it was laughable except that he decided he would ride his contraption at high speeds up and down the highway at the end of our block. Yeah, he crashed and broke his neck. Yup, I’ll say it again, he broke his neck and lived and came home with holes drilled in his head from which a metal circle was connected with a base that sat a top his shoulders that reminded me of those cones they give dogs so they don’t lick their own wounds, but it was just a frame meant to keep the weight of his head from snapping his spine again. The words, “mediaeval torture” device came to mind and all of us neighbor kids sat in awe as we watched him from the vantage point of my lawn, the highest elevation in the neighborhood and from my front step provided the most perfect option to spy directly into his garage where he was manically repairing his motor bike and cursing the metal frame bolted his to his skull as it impeded his progress especially when he tried to maneuver his head. We joked that the idiot would probably get on the thing and ride around the block at high speed as was his custom. And it was just a joke until late that same afternoon when we first heard then saw him motor out of the garage onto the driveway and into the street, obviously he wasn’t wearing a helmet and his parents peeped through the drawn curtains at Crazy Frankenstein, their second son.

It isn’t easy describing the image of a lunatic and painting a picture in words of a man’s head bobbing up and down inside a frame that looked, oddly enough, like those stands gardeners use to hold up tomatoes, except for the way it was bolted to his skull is an exhausting feat and if a group of us had not witnessed it I might think it was just a hallucination. And anyone who didn’t know him simply would refuse to believe that someone who had just returned from the hospital with a broken neck would spend a day repairing the motorcycle that put him there only to get on and ride it later that very afternoon. But this is true, it did happen and even those of us who knew him watched with open mouthed speechlessness and wide round eyes as he speed by back and forth in front of us for over an hour.

And he wasn’t the worse for wear. Nope. The next year on the 4th of July around dusk a couple of us were sitting around waiting to go out when Crazy Frankenstein crossed my driveway and walked up the hill towards us. We could see that he had an empty plastic gallon milk container and a handful of bottle rockets in his big mitts. This was odd because he didn’t usually “hang” with us and we were shamefully eager to see what he would do. Without a word he plops the flimsy container down next to me, drops the stem of the bottle rocket in and gets out his lighter. I said, “when you light that the weight of the rocket is going to lay it down and it will shot straight into the shurbs across the street, the dry shrubs.” It had been a very dry summer. He poo~pooed me and continued to light it off. Well gravity and propulsion being what it is, the rocket shot straight into the dry shrubs as predicted. “See”, I said, “I told you that would happen!” I’m always the voice of reason and this time was no exception. As I puffed up my chest we saw sparks fall into the pine needles below a front window of the dark house and waited, but nothing happened. Then a light came on in the window just above the shurbs and a voice called out, “Hey what are you trying to do set my house on fire, ha, ha, ha?” and at the trail end of the voice we all witnessed the shurbs go up in flames. And a real burning bush was seen by all. It burned fast and big and bright as a bonfire in the semi darkness. We sucked in our breath. We all stood up at the same time, but knew not what to do. Then other lights started to come on in the neigbhorhood and soon the underside ledge that topped the bush was involved in flames and the man’s voice started screaming obscenities and he came out his front door. He was hopping mad, I mean literally that he was hopping up and down screaming, while he should have been getting out his garden hose, or maybe just calling the fire department, but he didn’t, even when voices out of nowhere yelled at him to call. Others were carrying pails of water from up and down the street and while they tried to run with them the buckets just spilled wetting the road and seeping into the pavement, leaving dark patches and a misshapen trail to the edge of the lawn in front of his house that was now clearly on fire. And after what seemed a long time we heard sirens in the distance and then were deafened by them when they arrived in full view. Crazy Frankenstein never did anything, he just starred at the flames and listened while that man verbally accosted him from across the street. The whole block stood and watched while the firemen did their business. And Crazy Frankensteins parents got sued for the damages!

So the next night we are sitting on my front step and Crazy comes over. He sits down and dislodges an M-80 from his crusty jean pocket. He lights it and throws it into the street. It explodes with a roar and we all kind of duck our heads in the shadows when the neighbor hood lights begin to click on one at a time. He waits, then dislodges another and throws it into the street, but with a little more force and we watch while it rolls down the smooth pavement spins a couple times and stops dead directly underneath another neighbors car. It’s the silence in between when the explosive stops and the anticipation of what will happen when it blows that is the most exhilarating! And we watched, holding our collective breath. I didn’t even look over at Crazy, now I wish I had, but there were only long seconds in between when he threw it and when it landed before it ignited with the second load roar of the night. Boom!

The Gods must have been smiling on Crazy Frankenstein that night, because the car wasn’t damaged.

See For Yourself!

The quintessential

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