We were all born with an inner gauge to help protect us when we are in danger. It’s called an intuition. When we were children we just used it without censor by responding naturally to circumstances that upset us. We didn’t care if anyone saw us crying and we didn’t think about it when someone bothered us, we just knew. Over the years, through parental and other environmental circumstances we began to rely less and less on our intuition and more and more on what other people told us was real. We were conditioned to stop trusting our own instincts, some of us more than others, but the experience is universal.
I was studying a list of my previous relationships and discovered that I could have saved myself a lot of time and heartache if I had just trusted my gut. It may not have happened in the beginning of the relationship, but sometimes it did. Like I just had a feeling that I didn’t trust this person or there was something that made me feel uncomfortable, but I didn’t acknowledge that feeling for many reasons, one primary reason that comes to mind is that I wanted to be in a relationship, plain and simple. So I would put up with circumstances that weren’t ideal because I thought I had to make a trade off. This concept of a trade off wasn’t always conscious it just lurked somewhere in my “programming” and it said, “this is what you do for love”.
I remember recently dating someone who was incredibly nice. We arranged to go out and on the night of the date just an hour before we were supposed to meet he called and said he wasn’t feeling well and canceled. Now I understand and accept that a person cannot pre-plan an illness, but at the same time what he did was incredibly irresponsible. I decided, because I hadn’t dated anyone in a long time that I would give him another chance, but something in my gut told me he was lying and I didn’t listen. So we went out again and the relationship progressed and got physical and you guessed it he turned out to be irresponsible, immature and dishonest. So I had to end it after I had become “somewhat” emotionally involved. I learned from that experience to trust my intuition about other people. I am learning to do it more and more and when I test it, when I look back at past relationships I notice I have known when I was doing something that was not right for me and would not serve me in the long run.
Has this ever happened to you? Did you ever just know something was not right, but you did it anyway?